most if not all your answers can easily be found by searching around a little on these boards but to answer a few questions yes cognition is my personal favorite and the most stable release i am running 2.3b8, 2.3b6 is also an excellent choice.
this site will take you step by step thought the whole process
http://www.ponack.net/how-to-flash-cognition-on-your-Captivate/yes you can always go back to how it was right out of the box using odin heres the info on that.
http://forum.xda-developers.com/showthread.php?t=731989what i always do on the contacts is open them up and hit the menu and export to sd card and then you can restore on the new rom good luck